Sleep loss can kill a relationship. In a study at the University of California at Berkeley, researchers found that sleep deprivation fractures brain mechanisms that tame our emotional responses to stressors. In other words, once provoked by a spouse or significant other after sleep deprivation, there's no guarantee we will play nice. And that kills sex and considerably lowers the chances of staying together. Here's how to make sure that doesn't happen.
1. TALK TO YOUR PARTNER.
Be factual, brief, and don't bring in other issues. Avoid personal criticism. Women who refuse to discuss sleep issues with their partners may be putting themselves at risk for more than insomnia. A Maryland study recently found that women who "self-silenced" during conflicts with their spouses were four times more likely to die over a 10-year period than women who did not.
2. EMPHASIZE THAT IT'S "OUR" PROBLEM.
That makes it clear that you're in this for the long haul and you've got his back.
3. ENCOURAGE HIM TO GET HELP.
Suggest he make an appointment with your family doctor to discuss the issue and consider whether or not a referral to a sleep center certified by the American Academy of Sleep Medicine would help.
4. USE PROPS.
Eye masks, ear plugs, white-noise machines, mattresses with "firmness" controls, feather boas-use whatever it takes to increase the likelihood that you'll sleep through your partner's tossing and turning.
5. SEPARATE.
If the problem is long-term, think twin beds or separate rooms. You can always tiptoe in for a morning cuddle after a good night's sleep.
失眠可能會導(dǎo)致情侶間關(guān)系的破裂。加利福尼亞大學(xué)伯克萊分校的研究人員進行了一項調(diào)查,他們發(fā)現(xiàn),失眠會引起腦機制的紊亂,從而影響對應(yīng)激物的情感反應(yīng)。換句話說,一旦被愛人或者伴侶打擾了睡眠,我們就容易變得煩躁不安。這會導(dǎo)致不愉快的性生活,使雙方難以相處。不過不用擔(dān)心,這里的小秘訣能有效地防止此類事情發(fā)生。
1. 和伴侶聊聊天
實際一點,簡短一點,不要扯到其他話題,不要批評伴侶。如果你的女伴不想在睡時談?wù)搯栴},那可能說明煎熬她的可不只是失眠。最近,一項來自馬里蘭大學(xué)的研究顯示,和與伴侶爭吵時"發(fā)揮正常"的相比,那些"自行安靜"的女性減少十年壽命的可能性大大地增加了。
2.強調(diào)這是"我們的"問題
這將告訴你的伴侶,你會一直陪伴在她/他身邊,不棄不離。
3. 鼓勵她/他去尋求幫助
建議她/他去找找你們的家庭醫(yī)生,一起研究睡眠問題;美國睡眠醫(yī)學(xué)學(xué)會認證了一些睡眠中心,可以考慮前往那些醫(yī)院尋求幫助。
4. 采用小道具
眼罩、耳塞、白噪聲機1 、能控制好的墊子、毛皮披肩---無論是什么。當伴侶翻來覆去時,用些小道具能讓你睡得更安穩(wěn)。
5. 分開睡覺
如果這個問題已經(jīng)持續(xù)很久了,可以考慮睡在不同的床或者分房。安睡一夜后,這時能來一個溫情的偎依。