How to gracefully and painlessly remove yourself from sticky social situations？How to escape a dull conversation at a party?

    如何輕松得體地從那些“粘人”的社交場合中脫身？如何逃離聚會中的無聊談話?如何結(jié)束一場爭執(zhí)？對于這些常見的尷尬處境，本文將教你幾招，讓你和尷尬說拜拜。

    Escape a dull coversation 結(jié)束無聊的談話

    At a cocktail party (assuming you haven’t made the mistake of sitting down with the person), it’s fine to excuse yourself to get a drink or food, help the hostess, or make a phone call. (If you did sit down, employ the same tactics. It’s just a little more awkward having to get up.) To avoid an embarrassing getaway “gotcha,” be sure to follow through on your excuse — that is, get the drink, help the hostess, make a call.

    在雞尾酒會上（假設(shè)你還沒傻傻地和一個無聊的人一塊坐下），如果想抽身，就托辭去拿飲料或食物、幫助女主人或打電話（如果你坐下了，也可以采取同樣辦法，不過會稍微尷尬一些）。為了不讓你在”勝利大逃亡“中被尷尬地逮住，就一定要”說到做到“，即：去拿飲料、幫女主人、打電話。

    Another tried-and-true tactic? Introduce the bore to someone else, excuse yourself, and scram. This way, you avoid leaving the bore stranded, and he becomes someone else’s problem. Who knows? They may hit it off.

    有別的切實可行的招數(shù)嗎？你可以把這無聊的人介紹給別人，然后找個借口趕緊撤！這樣就避免了被無聊的人纏身，他成了別人的麻煩�？烧l知道呢？說不定那兩人會很投機。

    Escape a telemarketer 逃離電話營銷員

    A polite “Thanks, I’m not interested” is your best response to unwanted calls. “The caller will probably come back with a benefit statement or a probing question” — such as Are you aware this will cut your insurance bill in half? — says Kimberly King, president of InterWeave Corporation, a customer-service consulting firm in Tampa. Again, thank the person and hang up. Don’t let her rattle on, which is a waste of your time and hers. And never explain or volunteer anything. Telemarketers work from a script with responses to common customer objections (called “soft no’s” in the industry). Saying another family member needs to make the decision will only lead to more questions: What time will he be in? Can I call back then? Finally, ask to be taken off the calling list, and wait for the telemarketer to do it before you hang up. That extra minute is worth it.

    一句客氣的“謝謝，我不感興趣”是給煩人電話的最好答復(fù)。打電話的人大概又會說他/她將給你帶來什么樣的好處，或者問你這樣的問題，比如Kimberly King會問：“你知道嗎，這能讓你的保險帳單費減半。” Kimberly KingInter是Weave Corporation的總裁，這是一家位于坦帕市的客服咨詢公司。你繼續(xù)說謝謝，然后就掛斷電話。別由她嘰里呱啦說個不停，浪費你倆的時間。不要做任何解釋或自愿做任何事情。電話營銷員都采用一個腳本來對付客戶通常做出的拒絕（行話叫“軟拒絕”）。如果你回答道：這要由家人做決定。那他/她就會窮追不舍，提出更多問題：他什么時候會在家里? 到時候我再打電話好嗎？最后，只好要求他/她把你的號碼從呼叫單上撤除，并且要求對方撤除后你再掛電話。多花點時間是值得的。

    Escape a Stumper 如何對付“提難題的人”

    How do you say “I don’t know” without sounding, well, dumb? Especially in a nerve-racking setting, like a job interview? Be direct, says Sue Shellenbarger, a career-advice columnist at the Wall Street Journal: Just say, “That’s a great question. I’d like to think about it and get back to you.”

    要怎樣說“我不知道”才能讓自己聽上去不傻？尤其在一個讓人緊張的場合，比如工作面試？華爾街的職業(yè)建議專欄作家Sue Shellenbarger的建議是：坦白。只要說：“這個問題很好，我要先考慮一下再回答。”

    If you don’t have a good answer because you haven’t been doing your job well, apologize and specify when you’ll get back on the query; then be sure to do so or you’ll lose credibility. If putting off the question isn’t an option (you’re a keynote speaker at an event; you’re being interviewed on TV), employ the Ted Kennedy strategy, says Anne Fisher, who writes Ask Annie, a career-advice column for CNNMoney. com: “Say, ‘That’s a good question, but an even more interesting question is.…’” Then talk about what you do know. “It’s worked for Kennedy,” says Fisher. “He’s been elected eight times.”

    如果是因為自己的工作一直沒做好而找不到一個好的答案，那么就道歉，然后確定何時反饋該問題的結(jié)果；然后，一定要說話算話，否則你將會失去信用了。如果不可能推遲回答問題（例如你在演講或在電視上被采訪），Anne Fisher說可以采取Ted Kennedy（肯尼迪總統(tǒng)的弟弟）的策略。Anne Fisher是CNNMoney網(wǎng)站職業(yè)建議專欄《問安妮》專欄作家。你可以說“這個問題問得很好，但更有趣的是......” 然后就說你知道的。” Fisher說：“這個辦法幫過Kennedy的忙。他贏得八次議員選舉。”

    Escape a spat with your significant other 如何結(jié)束爭執(zhí)

    He started it. Well, maybe you did. Either way, you don’t want to talk about it anymore. Do you have to finish what you began? No, says David Ransburg, a therapist at the Family Institute at Northwestern University, in Evanston, Illinois. In fact, you shouldn’t continue until you’re calm. “When we’re in a ‘flooded’ emotional state, access to the part of the brain where logical thinking resides is inhibited, and IQ drops noticeably — perhaps by as much as 15 points,” says Ransburg. “This is when we say things we wish we could take back.” So call a time-out. Typically, your logic will return in about 20 minutes, at which point you can resume the discussion in a productive way.

    剛才是他引發(fā)的爭吵，嗯，說不定是你。但不管是誰，反正你不想再吵下去了。一定要吵出個究竟才會罷休嗎？David Ransburg說：不。David Ransburg是伊利諾斯州Evanston市西北大學家庭學院的一名治療學家。他說，實際上，在你心情平靜前，不應(yīng)該繼續(xù)說下去。 Ransburg說：“爭吵時，我們都處于一個“頭腦發(fā)脹“的狀態(tài)，不理智，智商顯著下降了大概15個點，這時候說過的話會讓我們后悔”。所以，先暫停。通常，你的邏輯能力會在大約20分鐘后恢復(fù)，然后以具有成果性的方式進行討論。

    If you can’t call a time-out midspat, practice with tiny disagreements, suggests Ransburg, when you’re both less likely to take things personally。

    如果你不能”中場暫停“，Ransburg的建議是，人們用細小的爭論來練習，因為此時你們兩人較不容易感情用事。